You know how to listen.
You know how to hold space.
You know how to be there for people when they are moving through something tender.
Because somewhere along the way…
Caring became carrying.
Attunement became entanglement.
Holding space became overextending.
Service became self-abandonment.
Being empathic became being a magnet for what was never yours to carry.
Not all at once.
It happens gradually.
You overgive.
You overextend.
Absorbing someone else’s emotions like porous earth taking in rain.
You find yourself caught in the mental loop of their pain, their story, their experience—as though it were your own.
You say yes when your body means no.
You feel responsible for how someone else feels.
You take on what was never yours to take on.
And over time, you may notice:
You feel depleted after years of holding space.
You carry other people’s emotions and stories long after they leave.
You’ve become disconnected from your own needs.
You’re not always sure what belongs to you anymore.
And somewhere along the way, you begin to feel distant from the person you know yourself to be.
As though someone quietly dimmed the lights inside you—and you can’t quite find your way back to the switch.
You became better at holding everyone else than belonging to yourself.self.